As you start planning you special day and adding up all the costs, you may begin to wonder who is going to be able to pay for all that? Well, rest assured that unless you absolutely have to do things on your own, wedding etiquette for who pays for what divides the responsibilities among both the couple and their families if all are willing.
The bride’s family is usually responsible for the wedding ceremony itself according to traditional wedding etiquette for who pays for what. This would include the items and activities that take place during the ceremony.
The bridal gown, flowers, reception, invitations, announcements, favors, pictures, limo, and venue fees all fall to the bride’s parents. They should also cover their own expenses such as travel, clothing, and lodging if needed.
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Wedding etiquette for who pays for what leaves other things up to the groom’s family. Traditionally, they will take care of the expenses for the rehearsal dinner, which includes the invitations, venue fees for the dinner, flowers, entertainment, and a wedding gift for the new couple.
The only thing they cover for the reception is the groom’s cake if there is one. The bride and groom don’t get off totally free. They too have expenses according to wedding etiquette for who pays what.
The bride, of course, pays for her new husband’s wedding ring if he is going to wear one. Most of the time, she will pick a band that closely matches her wedding set. She also buys a gift for the groom and her attendants.
If she has her hair professionally arranged, she covers that expense along with any skin treatments or other beauty consultations. If she has attendants from out-of-town that need help with lodging, it is appropriate for her to help that expense, although they pay for their own travel expenses.
If the bride decides to have a bridesmaid luncheon, she should cover that cost. The groom should pay for the bride’s wedding set and a gift for her. He traditionally pays for the marriage license and honeymoon if it sticks to wedding etiquette for who pays for what.
Other incidentals that the groom is responsible for include the bride’s bouquet, gifts and boutonnières for his attendants, corsages for the grandmothers and mothers, and whatever fee is due to the person officiating the ceremony, as well as his own attire.
The bridesmaids and groomsmen are responsible for their wedding clothing. They should pay for their own travel. The bridesmaids would buy a gift for the bride and host a shower and bacherlorette party at their expense. The groomsmen, likewise, would buy the groom a gift and pay for his bachelor party.
In this ever non-traditional world, however, many times the roles are reversed or re-divided depending on individual needs. The couple may decide to cover all costs for themselves.
They can also ask the parents to contribute a portion up to a third of the total costs without breaking etiquette rules for who pays for what. They should expect the parents to invite a third of the guests, however, if they decide to divide the costs in this manner.
Whichever way you decide to have the costs paid, you should try to make your wedding budget reasonable so that you don’t start your marriage in debt. If you want an elaborate wedding that doesn’t fit in your budget, you should save or try to find economical substitutions that will look just as nice.
You should never expect the two sets of parents to spend extravagantly if they can’t afford that even if it is your special day. Follow the plan of etiquette that best fits for who can pay for what in your wedding.
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